Bill Bellamy Takes His Comedy Act On The Road

A little boy comes home excited from school shouting "mama mama i got the biggest dick in the second grade (631)704-9073

this is a joke for the tickets for the Bill Bellamy show.........BREAKING NEWS:CNN has just reported Kermit "de" Frog has just passed away, the cause of death is swine flu. He finally ate Miss Piggy's pussy.

carl chance 862-686-8708

A boy turns 13. His dad says today you learn the value of a dollar. He gives his son the dollar and tells him to spend it wisely. The boy walks around town and sees a man selling ducks. He asks the price and the man says $2. He says he only has $1. The man says its my last duck, you can have it for a dollar. He's walking down the block and sees a woman standing in a doorway. She calls him, he shies away. She calls him again he goes over to her. "Do you know who I am she asked"? He said "you're a hooker". She asks if he'd like to go upstairs, he says he has no money. She asks his age and he responds 13 today. She says since its your birthday we'll do it for the duck. They go upstairs and she rocks his world for an hour. They finish, go back outside and the duck flees out of the hookers arms and into the street. The duck gets hit by a tractor trailer. The truck driver get out, sees the boy all upset and apologizes. He gives the boy $2 to by another duck. The boy goes home and they sit down for dinner. The dad says how was your day, the boy responds great. The dad says how did you spend your dollar, the boy responded,

I got a duck for a buck, a fuck for a duck, and 2 bucks for a fucked up duck

Here's a joke for Bill Bellamys free ticket giveaway A man asks his wife "Honey how come you never let me know when you have an orgasim"? & she replies "Oh you know how I hate to bother you when you're at work".

Two old men sitting on the stoop one said to the other....boy how times have change remember back in the day when you had to move a woman panty to see her butt .now ah day you have to move the butt to see the panty..lol

a husband&wife arrive in heaven.wife says here we are together again husband says fuck that shit the deal was till death do us part.bitch i am single 718-807-7772

While sitting on the train in new york me and my home boy was talking. When we notice a bun sitting in the corner. At first we paid him no mind until i thought i noticed that every time i said something to my friend it felt like he was getting closer and closer. after a while it felt like i was playing red light green light with this dude. "I look at him, he didn't move. I look away he was closer." it really got bad when i said to my friend: " i can't believe that the cavs. are out of the playoff". I then felt heavy breathing on my neck and smelt a strong order past my nose with the words " i thought Lebron was gonna win a championship this year" followed.I then look over my shoulder. it was that damn bum!!! (973)-444-4272

ONE DAY AFTER ME AND MY GIRL WAS DRIVING HOME FROM A PARTY. MY GIRL ASKED ME "BABY HAS ANYONE EVER TOLD YOU HOW HANDSOME,AND SEXY YOU TO WOMEN" I SAID,NOT THAT I CAN RECALL,WHY? SHE SAID,THEN WHAT THE HELL GAVE YOU THAT IDEA AT THE PARTY TONIGHT STUPID!!!!

A joke for Bill Bellamys free ticket giveaway..............A little boy questions his dad. "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Dad replies "Well son, Daddy climbs on top of Mommy and puts his penis in her vagina. Nine months later, out comes a baby". "Oh" says the boy. "Well last night I walked past your bedroom I saw your penis in Mommy's mouth. What do you get for that?" Dad replies "Jewelry!"